Unobtainable
by hopscot
Summary: Asking her out is hard enough, but the real test is the date. From overprotective Pokemon to... Actually, it's just the overprotective Pokemon, but boy are they a challenge. One-shot.


**This is just a little one shot about my favorite Pokemon Champion and why it's impossible for any man to date her.**

**So that means that this is going to be about Cynthia and the trials that any guy who asks her out has to conquer before they can even have a chance at her. Naturally though, they never pull through, they never had a chance to begin with, and they never saw coming what was about to happen.**

* * *

"What is their location?"

"They've just entered the restaurant."

"And the rating of this restaurant?"

"Fabulous!"

"I'm looking for stars here!" a growl responded.

"Four stars as of last month. The food is... Well, I've never tasted it but I bet it's yummy!"

A scowl spread across Garchomp's face as she took this in. "That's one less star than he could have gone for..."

Atop a roof in a grand city of the Kalos region were stationed a group of some of the most powerful Pokemon in the world. Perfectly still they would kept their gaze locked on a high-end restaurant located stories below them only to break off occasionally to speak with another. Careful to not draw any attention they would look over the ledge for moments before moving back. They needed no one to look up and see the head of one of the powerful beasts. They needed no one to know they were here. They needed their trainer to never know.

"It's rank is the highest among all restaurants in the city. Would you have prefered he hauled her miles away to the nearest five star establishment to attempt a courting?" Milotic inquired calmly.

"If he were worth a nickel he would have an instant mode of transportation. Teleportation does exist," Garchomp argued.

Milotic tilted her head down as she conceded to her teammate's point. "How silly of me to forget."

Garchomp merely grunted as she stepped forward and refocused her attention on the restaurant below. Through the night sky each face of human or Pokemon appeared clearly to her. She wrote off each as insignificant as fast as she saw them. There was only one human whom she could ever truly care for and so she needed to protect her, no matter the cost. She could not see her trainer but she could feel her, behind those walls, next to that man. Her eyes narrowed as she thought of the meager filth. So far he had done nothing to stand out against the sea of suitors. He had won a league tournament? It was nothing to even look at.

Garchomp stepped back from the ledge and lowered her head until her back was almost horizontal. Even if she were to move away her bulk would still be noticeable from the right position. Even with her dorsal fin sticking out she was less visible this way. She didn't mind though.

Togekiss stayed perched on a wooden box that was on the roof with Glaceon seated on the concrete floor next to him. They watched Spiritomb as he... she? IT!? (none of them honestly had a clue on what gender the Spiritomb was) used its powers to distort the air in front of it. Images could occasionally be seen in the space but Spiritomb needed more time to perfect its creation. They would wait with patience though. They already knew how long it usually took to conjure a viewing screen on no solid surface. Lacking the psychic type it was impressive that Spiritomb could even accomplish such a thing, and for that they were thankful.

All the credit did not go to Spiritomb though. Near it Lucario sat cross legged and eyes closed in concentration. He reached out his sights to the aura of every living thing within a half mile, even beyond that somehow. He placed the bulk of his perception on the restaurant while still conducting quieter scans of the rest of the area. These small scans were not large enough to put Spiritomb off as it drew from the information that Lucario allowed it to see. It used this to make its viewing screen stronger, more complete.

"So, when do ya reckon this poor chap will fail Garchomp's little analysis?" Braviary asked Eelektross as he moved away from the ledge once again.

"It looks like he's already failed," Eelektross answered lazily from her position curled up on the floor. She didn't need to look to know how this will end. Garchomp would determine that the man is unfit to be a mate for their trainer due to one extraordinarily superficial trait, then she would have them 'take him out' the second that their trainer turns her back. She was beginning to wonder how bored she was if she came to these little set ups every time.

"Guys, it's almost ready," Gastrodon announced to those who weren't paying full attention when the viewing screen gained clarity to provide them an eye into the restaurant.

"Fancy," Glaceon remarked as she made some parts of the screen out. "This one must really like her."

"This one will really wonder what he did last night when he wakes up to find all that money gone," Braviary snarked, coming up to the screen.

"I know right. It's such a shame that he won't remember that his money went to the noble cause of trying to impress a woman," Roserade said.

"He'll be just one man left in that state by the morning," Milotic dismissed. "That is, if he does not appeal."

"We'll see what show he can put on," Garchomp grumbled as she walked closer to the screen. Farther away from the ledge she returned to a more comfortable position.

"I can see where this is going. Dance monkey, dance!" Glaceon giggled along with Togekiss.

Spiritomb let out a wispy cackled as it added a final push to complete the screen. Lucario retracted his support the instant it was no longer required. The screen transformed from a space of air that images appeared in to an oval shaped projection as clear as a mirror. The same image would be shown from any direction it was looked upon eliminating any issues of crowding before they were even a concern.

They all looked into it.

...

She responded with a sweet smile as he pulled out her chair for her. It had done little to soothe his nervousness though. Always afraid to falter at any moment he often took deep breaths which helped little. She had an imposing aura that seemed to be suffocating him.

Taking this in she quietly took her seat and gently touched his shoulder, attempting to say something that might calm him. He offered a nervous smile in return but it appeared to have worked somewhat. He took his own seat, all the while she was watching him, observing. She retracted such a gaze when she had returned to his field of vision. She didn't want to put him off.

...

"So far in he's..." Togekiss trailed off for someone else to finish.

"A gentleman," Roserade finished for him. He continued. "But you can tell that he knows how far out of his league he's aiming."

Braviary nodded. "Aye. The shock from her actually saying 'yes' isn't even gone yet, not that the miss minds though."

"We'll see how true that is. She's treating him as she's treated all the other suitors," Milotic observed. "We have not even influenced the date yet and already he seems to be only another failure."

"That doesn't mean that we won't have our fun with him does it?" Glaceon pouted. "That's always the funniest part."

"What do you think? 'Dance monkey, dance.' It's almost a tradition by now," Eelektross said.

"It almost sounds sadistic the way we bring it up though," Lucario muttered.

Milotic raised her head and nodded in Lucario's direction as a form of agreement. "I'm glad that I'm not the only one who feels that way."

Garchomp, ignoring the rest, looked from the screen to Gastrodon. "What are they saying?"

As the screen only showed imaged it lacked sound for the Pokemon to hear what it projected to them. Gastrodon, being the only one of them who read lip served as their interpreter for what was being said. They could only rely on him for this service so much though. Sounds or things being said outside of the screen were as apparent as not being there at all.

"They're just speaking of their interests," Gastrodon said. "He says that he enjoys jumping between hobbies to experience what they all have to offer."

"Is that it?"

...

She contemplated each action he took, will take. Each gesture, even word predicted before he had ever thought to act in such a way. His behavior was as proper as he could make it but he did not know all table etiquette. He was hiding himself, she could tell. It did not come as a surprise to her though. From the moment she had met him she sensed that he was not acting as his usual behavior would have him. As curious as she was of his real self though that wasn't what she had been after when she accepted this little engagement.

'_It's become so predictable, but...'_ He decided their orders and passed them along to the waiter trying to appear more confident. Though not in her style she had let him choose for her. The corner of her mouth raised slightly when he had chosen something different from what she had expected. It was off by just but still.

He moved to hand the order sheets to the waiter. Then she saw it. Not the cause but the effect. The table shifted and the motion caused the man to tumble out of his chair. In an effort to stop this he grabbed the closest thing, which happened to be the waiter's crotch.

Through the shrill cry she sighed and prepared herself for the show, determined to find something that would help her make sense of this some way.

...

They laughed at the effect after Spiritomb had used Psychic on the scene they viewed. Fairly used to their influence having little impact it was a treat to produce something entertaining from such a simple action.

Glaceon giggled. "If only we could take a picture."

"That would risk our lady finding it. Just savor the memory if you enjoyed it so," Milotic advised.

"That and try to make more to go along with it. Who wants to place bets on how long it will take until she excuses herself from him?" Roserade asked, waving his bouquet.

"I'd say forty minutes, if we do manage a good job in there," Braviary said.

Garchomp grinned at the thought. Fourteen minutes. Their record by far. As soon as this man is out of her master's sights it would not matter if the whole restaurant saw it happen, they would get him out of there.

"How bout an evaluation guys. How did he score on his first step along the bumpy road?" Gastrodon asked his teammates.

"He's proven that somewhere inside he's shooting for the other team," Eelektross responded.

...

The awkwardness did not end with the crotch grabbing. Two times in a row their orders had been mixed with those of other customers. She'd retain a mild tone as she inquired on what could be the cause of this confusion, searching for any clues she could find. They did not, however, seem to know the trigger of their lapse in service for the two themselves. He had threatened to issue a complaint, but with a few light words against it he quickly was forced to throw away the idea. She knew that he wouldn't enjoy doing such a thing anyway.

When their orders did finally reach them via the heavily blushing waiter he had given his compliments on the appearance alone. The taste however was off, for him at least. For her the food was heavenly. At first he assumed that the food was meant to taste like it had. Not wanting him to stain himself on the bad taste though, she offered him a sample from her own plate and insisted that he have the issue fixed.

To keep his mind away from the complications she continued to share her own food with him. Bringing up the topic of their Pokemon while doing so brought the effect of perking him up. She smiled, listening as he went on about the companions he had met on his journeys. She could always rely on the subject to help a fellow trainer express themselves. Everyone had their own stories that shaped them and their perspectives. Hearing them brought a lightness to her heart.

The arrival of his order came in due time, along with apologies. The offer was made for their dinner to be free of charge. He wanted to accept, but she declined knowing that it would lessen the punishment of whomever was blamed. They weren't the one at fault.

Few minutes after he had taken his first bite she saw him attempting to hide the mild and growing discomfort that he felt. She frowned, displeased but not surprised. Her date was always targeted in some way at every possible opportunity until they disappeared. Perhaps this was his time. Sheepishly, he excused himself from the table and made a path to the restrooms.

...

"Alright, we all know that you don't like him. Do we nab him now?" Braviary directed at Garchomp.

Garchomp contemplated her answer. "Hm."

"What! But there's still got to be more fun to milk out of him," Glaceon objected.

Eelektross nodded. "We got a good laugh at his crotch grab but everything else after that has been rubbish."

"You have to make your choice now. He's almost at the restrooms," Lucario announced.

Finally, Garchomp decided. "Glaceon, do you have something you want to use to play with him?"

Glaceon beamed at her.

...

She had considered this date ended the second he walked out of her sight. That pattern never failed to be followed. When she heard a loud shriek and a slap that was painful to listen to she gave it little thought as she searched through her purse for the money to cover the bill. Him coming back with a red mark on his face was nothing she prepared herself to see.

Intrigued, she inquired on the mark he obtained. He stammered on the answer for several moments. He ended up not needing to talk as a women trudged close to him holding a glass of liqueur. She threw it into his face and walked away, leaving behind a tasteful insult.

She ran over her analysis, noting nothing new she disregarded everything she had witness thus far. Desiring to know more of this atypical occurrence she posed him several questions. He grew uneasy at her increased interest, her aura weighing him down more each word she spoke. In spite of this he answered to the best of his abilities. His responses did not satisfy her in the end. She concluded that she might need to examine the restroom doors for what may have made him travel into the wrong one.

This decision would mean leaving him alone to this force, which was best for him. As long as he stayed with her it would continue to attack him, even subtly. When it took him he would lose all memory of this date, of asking her out, of even meeting her. He would then become oblivious to everything in his past concerning her, memory replaced and thrown away. Anyone else who had knowledge of them ever interacting also were afflicted with the same condition. It did not appear to hurt, as far as she's studied it. Knowing that, she could accept it.

She excused herself from the table. Setting a path towards the restroom she left him behind, to whatever he would face. The signs were on the floor when she had found them. They lay under the opposite door they were designed to direct to. Picking both up she examined them.

'_The signs of a Psychic...'_ She has seen this before. Adequate evidence has been found to point to a person, or creature, possessing psychic abilities as responsible for the misfortunes of her dates. Nothing however, has been found that could narrow this conclusion down to a specific psychic or group.

She placed the signs back down, seeing what she had wanted.

...

He had screamed, flailed, even bit at one point. It was all futile however. He was beyond going back the moment Spiritomb had grabbed him from his own shadow. Multiple bodies surrounded him, pushing him to the floor, restraining him there, forcing his eyes open. A ghastly and terrifyingly gleeful face was the last thing he had seen before losing consciousness.

...

She usually did not bring her Pokemon with her during these arrangements. She still possessed a method to call her most faithful friend. A blow upon a Dragon Whistle was all it took. Each person, it was said, produced a different sound that only dragonic beasts could detect. Hers was a melodic, yet sorrowful tune that many dragons found appealing. None more so than her own.

The seconds ticked by. Before even passing into the minute mark her mighty dragon descended before her from the sky. She greeted her with loving strokes, then mounted on the Garchomp's back.

Garchomp cut cleanly through the sky as she flew, carrying her trainer. No directions were given, but she always knew what her trainer wanted. They connected in such a way that words often weren't required. There was still one thing she did not know about her dragon that intrigued her, at the moment. She doesn't thought much of it until they are reunited at the ends of her dates. The dragon's swiftness to appear at the sound of her whistle left her curious.

'_Where do you go...'_

* * *

**There it is. A short (in my opinion) one shot on one of my favorite Pokemon characters, who I hope will appear in the Kalos region. I won't be mad if she doesn't, but it would be pleasant if she does. (to me)**

**Anyway, on this I felt that the end might have been rushed. I just don't know of another way to finish it nor do I think I did the best job on the dating thing since I have next to no experience on that myself.**

**The thing on not using Cynthia's name was kind of an accident that was too late to change by the time I noticed that I was doing it. Two reasons for this: I kind of liked it, and it gave me an excuse for not thinking of the guys name.**

**I changed Gastrodon and Roserade's genders to male. This is because I like to see them as that. The same goes with Spiritomb. The reason that I put all of Cynthia's Pokemon in here is sort of because I like to think that the 'carry six Pokemon' rule is just common practice that arose from it being easier to care for them. You can see why this, most of the time, won't apply to a Champion right?**

**Favorite, or review. I'd like to know what people may think of my work and how they think that I may improve.**

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